Maritime authorities have today released a press statement that is believed to be linked to the most prestigious race on cyclings calendar, the QUON Road Race. The QRR is scheduled for Saturday morning the 11th May. The statement, which does not appear to be finialised, was said to have been found beside the image above on a photocopier.
"I would like to thanks the team for the opportunity that I have been given today. I will begin by announcing my revolutionary 4 point plan (note to self, don't forget to get this off Terra)
- From now on all events will start and finish within 50 meters of O'Connor shops (#socentral)
- Points will be deducted for people who actually follow through and do anything to support any events the QUON are holding.
- Arm flapping is to be rewarded above all other things
- From this day forward there will be no riding of criterium races, Triathlons will be the ultimate event.
While authorities have not identified the author of the plan it is believed that they are working with Australian Federal Police on a number of substantial leads.
1 comment:
The only man who hasn't received my life changing Dun Nuffin speech. Subsequently the only adult male that still does nothing. But credit where credit's due, he does nothing with aplomb.
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