COUNTDOWN!

1. The days until Smuppy's IM time is beaten
2. The days until Trevor disgraces himself (again) 
3. The days until The Angry Ginga gets in to a fight at IM (again)
4. The days until the QM is decided
5. The days until Port Macquarie loses its innocence with the arrival of Team Quon
6. The days until Rads has his next litre of Erdlinger
7. The days until The Rock does his first real Road Trip

Thomo's Ironman Chances Improve

Simon Thompson today annnounced the addition of multiple Ironman Australia Champion Lisa Bentley to his support team for this Sunday's race. Lisa got in touch with Simon when she heard he was racing his first Ironman this weekend in Port Macquarie and offered her services as bike consultant.

"He is an awesome athlete but I was just so concerned when I heard he was racing. I watched his race at the Athens Olympics and was stunned at the similiarities with his bike skills and mine."

Lisa, famous for getting off and walking down Matthew Flinders Drive in the 2006 Ironman which she won, is justifiably nervous about Simon's chances on Sunday.

"They have changed the course since I dominated it, and have cut off half the hill making it much easier - but my bike skills were at a different level to what I have seen of Simon on the bike."

"We have done a mountain of work and pinpointed 37 hills that he will dismount and walk down, and 15 corners he will either skip or scooter around."

With such careful preparation, Team QUON are quietly confident that Thomo will have his best Ironman finish ever.

Radnell/Connell Favourites for Tri; Ooo la laaa

QUON FAMILY TRIATHLON - RACE PREVIEW
Saturday is looking spectacular. 26 degrees. No rain. Sunny skies predicted. Perfect BBQ weather. The racing should be good clean fun. Old Skool mixed with New Skool. Draft legal racing in Speedo's.

We should all remember that Saturday's racing is for valuable DOUBLE POINTS. With Ironman Australia also double points, the Baby Jesus, the Uber Ginga and Bruce Almighty are the only other likely contenders for the QUON Championship. A strong guessing display on Saturday could be what is needed to take home the fabled urn come season's end.

Bruce Almighty and Mrs Almighty have really set the bar high, predicting a 25 minute race. This has given them the number one seeding; but the bookies don’t like their chances of going close and there has little money in the ring for them. They are currently at 50-1 on the Freeman tote.

The Skin and Bones clan has been the big movers of the day; coming in from 50’s early in the day upon the announcement that Nicole will be partaking in the race also.

Smuppy and his princess started the day as favourites, but punters have shied away from the Smith clan due to a rumour floating around that there is a Bollywood movie afternoon and that Paul may not even show up for the race.

No one can really predict what Zany Terra is going to do when he shows up; and as a result there has been no money on him at all; other than a single unnamed better who has laid down a motsa on him. Maybe this mystery better named “Frank” knows something that we don’t.

The QM and his sponsorship deal have been plagued with injury rumours during the week, but the QM has quashed any doubts about his fitness and is aiming to be on song for the big day.

Betting has been solid all day for the Thompson clan; they have a good foundation in an Olympian and Dietician. However, there is some concern that Simon may be a little sluggish after he received his internet download bill where he had racked up over $1,000 worth of red-tube videos. Word on the street is that Joseph and Mary are thought to be involved.

Punters still like the pairing of Mr Smooth, Rads Nads and his Uber runner wife, Kristen. They have predicted a 32.20 time that looks right on the money.

Gagel and Charli are my dark horse pick for this one. Gagel will be riding his weight for age bike and is known to get it going if you make him angry enough. He will like the draft legal racing style and will probably yell and scream for no apparent reason.

The big surprise has been the lack of money in the ring for the Preston boys. Young Jack spent all last winter building his base fitness on the home trainer and Brodie has been seen doing endless laps in the Dam on the farm. However, it appears that father Scott is the big question mark. One punter commented on his form “dun nothin all year in the crits, don’t expect nothin on satdee either”. It appears that history and good blood lines counts for nothing these days.

The smokeys in the race are the Rock and his pebbles; who have never completed a triathlon. Seeing rock in Speedo’s is sure to draw a big female following though.

On news that the sun was going to be out and that Gatorade would be served; there has not been a single dollar laid on Uber and his dogs.

ODDS AT SPORTSBET.COM
3-1 Rads Nads
8 -1 Baby J
10-1 Skin and Bones
15-1 QM
15-1 SWP (QAOM)
15-1 Smuppy
20-1 Zany
20-1 Gagel
50-1 Almighty
90-1 The Rock
1000-1 Uber Ginga

PARTICIPANTS (and times) CONFIRMED:

#1 Bruce Almighty and Mrs Almighty (25.00)
#2 Baby Jesus and Sam Thommo (27.40)

#3 Rads Nads and Uber Kris (32.20)
#4 Paul Smith and his Princess (32.29)
#5 QM and the Sponsor (33.00)
#6 Gagel & Charli (35.00)
#7 Skin and Bones; Olivia, Nicole and Lexi (39.28)

#8 SWP (QAOM); Brodie and Jacko (41.16)
#9 Zany Terracini and BellaT (41.00)

#10 Carl Fellows; Barley and Bella Fellows (his Labradors) (50.00)
#11 The Rock and his pebbles (51.20)

IRONMAN - catch me if you can

I propose a challenge to all the want-to-be hero's out there to beat my time.

In April 2000, weighing in at a very lean and ripped 53kg's I pulled off the race of my life. Even though I had 2 flats and a 7minute wait for the spares vehicle, I still recorded a time that will not be challenged by a fellow Quoner this year.
I swum 55:49, Rode 5:18:58, and brought it home to the tears of joy from my family with a 3:31:01 marathon. My overall finish time was 9:45:48, and will smash the Quon chumps that will be racing in 2009.
In fact - I will be as bold to say that no Quon member will finish the Australian Ironman in 2009. If we are talking odds, a Team Quon DNF would be a short priced $2.

Nathan Spillane - who has never DNF'd at Ironman

Smokey The Bear Says

Never make promises you can't keep!

Only you can prevent your family and friends from being let down by your thoughtless words and actions. In the CFA, you never know when you'll be called to pull on your giggle hat, orange overalls and canteen of water. So don't make promises if you know you might have to break them.

No One Puts QUON in the Corner

Two trophies; a bottle of Sherry and the QUON Master's sponsorship deal. Oooo La laaaah.

Squadra = Hubbards!

To the Squadra guys that ran the red light (at pace) in Woden nearly hitting the pedestrian and cyclist that had just got the green pedestrian light to cross - YOU ARE A BUNCH OF HUBBARDS!

Hodgey - maybe you could use some of the hard earned that these clowns give you on taking them to the kiddies traffic school in Belconnen!

Introducing: SMOKEY!

Hi guys,

The Angry Ginga has asked me to introduce myself to you all as I am going to be his "+1" for the greatest road trip ever (episode II).

Let me tell you a few things about myself. Just like Jumanji, I too started to go grey when I was 12, but unlike him I will not throw myself in front of a team mate in the middle of a race.

Damo tells me that one of you guys likes things from the sub-continent. Well, luckily enough I actually have an Indian girlfriend (dots - not feathers) called Tashy. If you are lucky enough I will bring some photos that you can look at.

I may look smart because of my glasses, but I am actually incredibly stupid. I also do really good impersonations of smoked goods.

Now, Damo has told me a few things about you guys but I might need some clarification on a few:

Why do I have to knock on the door of the bathroom before entering if Paul Smith is in there?

 If I'm with Nath at a night club, should I just throw him out and save everyone else the hassle?

 What's a lady bum?

 Is Rads a ranga?

Does anyone actually like Big Dog? 

What are my duties as (honorary) Quon Rookie?

 

Will anyone beat The Baby Jesus?

See ya,

Smokey.

Mechanical Cycling Basics: Chapter 1

Welcome to Team QUON's Mechanical Cycling Basics. This is the latest branch of cycling tips from the Causeway's and QUONLo's greatest ever cycle racing team.

This week's edition is how to Maximise your tyre's lifespan.

Tip 1. Run your tyres near to or at their recommended maximum inflation.

Tyres without enough pressure in them create rolling resistance (which slows you down), makes you more susceptible to pinch flats (because it is easier to compress the tyre) and puts more of the tyre in contact with the ground* (more tyre on the ground = more tyre wearing away).

*While some may argue that more tyre on the ground = more grip, QUONLo is a fast hot mix track that is so smooth that extra grip is not required (unless your name is Michael 'Hard as Nails' Bulters who could lap that track at the speed of sound if only he had equipment to stand up to his power)

Tip 2. 'Clean' your tyres while riding and regularly check your tyres for embedded debris.

If you ride through broken glass and manage to survive those few moments of terror when listening for the dreaded sound of a rapidly deflating tyre, chances are that you will have picked up tiny pieces of glass. To prevent these small tyre terrorists from downing your steed, run a gloved hand lightly over your wheels while riding to dislodge any stowaways before they can work their way through the tyre. Be careful while doing this to avoid jamming your hand between your frame and the tyre - not only is it amusing to others and usually creates chaos in the bunch, but you will most likely lock your wheel up (causing a dreaded skid - refer to tip 3) and badly bruise your hand in the process.

After your ride take the time to inspect your tyres - check any small cuts in the rubber for embedded slivers of road trash and dig these out with a small flat head screwdriver or something of the like. This dramatically reduces the amount of punctures you are likely to encounter and will increase the life of your tyres by preventing these small cuts from turning into gaping rips.

Tip 3. Skidding causes massive friction between the road surface and your tyre, and your tyre wears down quicker than the road.

Skids may be fun on your BMX as a kid, but skids on a training ride state one of two things: either a) you don't pay for your tyres and your mum picks you up if you get a flat or b) you are an idiot and like walking home in your cycling shoes. For those unfamiliar with what a skid does to a tyre please refer to the image below. This is very much a case of situation A.

So fellow cyclists - Best of luck with your tyre wear and remember if your mate gets a flat while out in the bunch, signal before you swing off so you don't take the bunch out (despite what you may see those culture clubbers doing!)

Happy riding

Team QUON Cycling Tips for Team Riders who are in a Team.

Russell Brand's 3 Step Pickup Plan... A successful approach but nothing that Halvo can't best!

Step 1. Approach target and read her book to her.

Step 2. Make target laugh.

Step 3. Unleash the neck support special...

And Score!!! 29 minutes after meeting target.

The challenge has been set. If anyman can out do Pommy Russ, Team QUON's Halvo can!

Message to Spud

Dear Spud,

I thought you might like to see one of my modeling pictures, me and Steve are over.

Kyle

Steve the prancing mincer with no chamois in my short knicks boyfriend says

Stop picking on Stevie, otherwise I will get the VelvetG to come knocking.

Where does this SPUD reside, he tickles my fancy....

oooooo Barracuda

Boys, whilst this photo shows the joy of being labelled Canberra's best male cycling team; there are some concerns over the disparity in the QUON hand symbol (the barracuda). Everyone should know the "2 in the pink, one in the stink rule". Please look at the QM, Spud and Toni for the correct way to barracuda.

In search of the perfect WAITRESS............

You want a HOT CHOCOLATE, what sort of nufty cyclist are you?

He's Not Dead!

He was spotted this morning by 2 TQ'ers. He wasn't drunk, and he wasn't fishing. He was in fact riding a bike!

What ever happened to the simple life?

I just want to ride my bike!

• I don't care too much for flash uniforms, covered in the sponsors logos;
• I think caravans, banners and the quon trophy are wanky;
• I don't drink coffee;
• I don't do triathlons, and;
• If the quon has become all about the dollar, I want out.

QM, watch Jerry McGuire. Not only may you finally understand what the quon stands for, but you might be inspired to create your own 'mission statement'.

Garry The Poet - 2nd at Australian Champs

Garry Halverson has proven that he is one of Australia's best triathlete's with a strong showing at the National Champs held in Perth yesterday. Unfortunately, the QUON's Rick Springfield (Jess Featonby) was involved in a crash and had to pull out of the race. Both The Poet and Springfield are looking like certainties for the London Olympics with both having strong recent performances.

Queenslander Courtney Atkinson confirmed his status as a master tactician by successfully defending his Australian Olympic Distance Triathlon title in today’s City of Perth Challenge.Following what was, by his lofty standards, a poor swim, the Beijing Olympian lead a pack of 16 off the bike before running away from Victorian-based ACT athlete Gareth Halverson at the halfway stage of the 10km run to win in a time of 1hr 46min 17secs. Halverson finished almost a full minute adrift, while up-and-coming Queenslander James Seear snaring bronze and in doing so earned himself automatic selection in the Under 23 field for the World Championships on the Gold Coast in September.

“I had a really poor swim because the young blokes were all hyped up and sprinted out for the first 200 metres and I really battled to get through the field from there,” Atkinson said.“Gareth went with me on the run and although we’re actually rooming together over here this weekend I really don’t know that much about his racing style and you’re never too sure how things will go because someone always jumps up and has a good day. But at the 5km mark it started to warm up and I suppose I was able to hold my pace and he dropped off a bit. That was the goal – to run out reasonably hard and then stick to a pace that I could hold evenly.” Halverson, 24, was happy with his return to form.

“I had a few injuries and then it was probably more of a mental challenge to turn things around, but that was a good race for me and gives me a solid platform going into what will hopefully be a strong season. I have a lot of people to thank, my coach, but mainly Team QUON who have shaped me into such a strong athlete."

Rod Tidwell Shield

Does anyone know who won it this year? Do we have to wait until the end of season presentation?

 Mongo - Easter is pretty close, anything you wanted to let the kiddies know about the Easter Bunny?

1 Flat white; made with a little bit of love please

is it too much to ask for ?

A magnificent season for Team QUON. Overall, the highest scoring male team in Canberra.
Thanks to Greg Long for the wonderful shots of the evening also!

Only one more sleep...

...until Vikings Valhalla are our bitches.

Please dicuss.

A cheeky lap of the lake

God bless Lake Burley Griffin...

another season over

The QM finished the season in fine form. His 08/09 season is now filed in the suitable place.

Harsh........but true.

Reidy, Robbo, Trumpet, and The Angry Ginga. Your time has come

The Quon needs you. The stage is set for a grand finale, the likes of which hasn't been seen since the last Saturday in September back in 1989!

It is down to the wire

V

The Team QUON Rockstars versus the Fat Norwegians.

* We have History and Destiny on our side.

* We have the Women, we have the attitude - we have a Heath Ledger look-a-alike.
* We have the smooth and hairless 4th Rogers brother - Shane Rogers.
* We live in Deakin you know, nowhere near Bonython.
* God damn it - we already have the Champions jerseys printed for next year.
* We have ALL the good looking people in the crowd on our side.
* We have everything going for us.

And YES - we will sook if we don't win.